The Postman Missions Quest/Spoiler

This quest takes a great deal of time and money. It can be worked on at any level but certain parts need 500 oz cap and at the end, the Player needs to be able to make it to and through Mintwallin, which can be done with others help.

This quest can be done in stages, depending upon your abilities or time constraints.

There are a total of 10 missions in five groups: Assistant Postman (cheaper parcels and letters), Postman (Post Officer's Hat), Grand Postman (boat discounts), Grand Postman for Special Operations (Waldo's Post Horn), and Arch Postman (use of locked Mailboxes).

Required Equipment
Since there is so much walking on "safe" paths, you should bring plenty of Food. Brown Mushrooms are the best. If you are a mage or paladin, bring plenty of Blank Runes also.

Assistant Postman
 * Approximately 650gp. Maybe more or less depending upon the routes you take
 * Crowbar
 * 20gp to travel to Folda

Postman
 * 20 Bones

Grand Postman
 * Moldy Cheese
 * Banana Skin
 * Dirty Fur

Grand Postman for Special Operations
 * Approximately 200gp. Maybe more or less depending upon the routes you take
 * 12 Arrows
 * Grapes

Arch Postman
 * 500oz of available capacity (no way to avoid it)
 * Travel money to Vega

Method
Start out by talking to Kevin at his post office between Thais and Kazordoon (here). Ask him for a mission and tell him you are interested in joining his guild (does not prevent you from joining a "normal" Tibia guild). If you are ever lost, forgot where you were going, or after you have completed a mission, always return to Kevin and ask about a mission.

Mission 1 - Check Postal Routes

 * 1) Head to Thais and take the Boat to Carlin(110gp)
 * 2) Walk to Femur Hills and carpet to Edron(60gp). The ramp to get Uzon is located here.
 * 3) Boat to Venore(40gp)
 * 4) Walk to Kazordoon and in deepest cave ride the Steam Boat to Cormaya(150gp, for the Kazordoon route to the ship, see here) - Alternately go back to Edron, to Cormaya, and boat to Kazordoon and back
 * 5) Return to Kevin's Post office (cheapest way is to walk through Rotworm caves to Edron, take the Magic Carpet to Femur Hills and walk to Kevin's Post Office)
 * 6) Tell Kevin you completed the mission

Mission 2 - Fix Mailbox

 * 1) Get a Crowbar (can be purchased from Edron, Darashia, Kazordoon, North of Thais (Lubo) and Venore)
 * 2) Take ferry to Folda(20gp) - North-West of Carlin (here)
 * 3) Climb to the top of the mountain (here) and 'use' the crowbar on the mailbox
 * 4) Return to Kevin and ask about advancement.

You are now an Assistant Postman! (cheaper parcels and letters)

Mission 3 - Bill Delivery

 * 1) Walk to Venore and seek out A Strange Fellow below the Depot (here)
 * 2) Talk to him and keep asking about his 'hat' until he gives in and takes his 'bill' (he will spawn Rabbits before he takes the bill)
 * 3) Return to Kevin.

Mission 4 - Aggressive Dogs

 * 1) Kevin will tell you the classic post officer's plight - aggressive dogs. He will also tell you that they are running low on bones in the "Post Officer's Fund".
 * 2) Get 20 bones (easiest way is to walk to Femur Hills and kill Goblins).
 * 3) Talk to Kevin, and tell him you brought "all" of the bones (he will take one at a time if you cannot carry all 20 at once). Ask about advancement.

You are now a Postman! (Post Officer's Hat)

Mission 5 - Present Delivery

 * 1) Ask about another mission. Kevin will tell you do deliver a present to Dermot on Fibula.
 * 2) As directed, open the right blinking door and take the present from the chest. DO NOT OPEN THE PRESENT!! If you try to open it, you will get nothing and the present will disappear. Once it disappears, you can never get it back with that character.
 * 3) Travel to Fibula to Dermot and give him the present
 * 4) Return to Kevin.

Mission 6 - New Uniforms

 * 1) Travel to Venore and talk to Hugo. He is located upstairs where they are selling dresses and other wares. Look for Velvet southeast of the main Depot.
 * 2) Ask Hugo about 'new dress patterns'. He will say he has no idea where Kevin got it from, and send you back.
 * 3) Return to Kevin to say 'new dress patterns'. He will send you to Talphion in Kazordoon.
 * 4) Go north to Kazordoon and talk to Talphion the technomancer. In Kazordoon, on the level with the rats, go to the west end of the passage west of the shops. Talphion is down two staircases and North. (See here.)
 * 5) Say 'new dress patterns' a few times until he understands you. He will send a letter to Kevin.
 * 6) Go Back to Kevin and ask about 'new dress pattern'. He will acknowledge the message from Talphion, and send you to Queen Eloise for the perfect colors.
 * 7) Go north to Carlin and find Queen Eloise. 'Hail' the queen and ask about 'uniforms.' She will send some samples to Kevin.
 * 8) Return to Kevin and ask about 'new dress patterns'. He will mention the samples from Queen Eloise, and tell you to figure out what smell dogs hate the most. He says that Noodles, King Tibianus's dog has the best sense of smell.
 * 9) Gather Moldy Cheese, Banana Skin and a Dirty Fur
 * 10) Go to Thais and to Noodles the king's dog at the castle
 * 11) Say "hi", "sniff banana skin", "do you like that?", "hi", "sniff dirty fur", "do you like that?", etc.
 * 12) Return to Kevin and mention "new dress pattern". He will tell you he is mailing the patterns to Hugo, and ask you to tell Hugo that they are ordering them.
 * 13) Return again to Hugo, 'new dress pattern.' He will insult the patterns, but ultimately agree to making them.
 * 14) Return to Kevin. Ask about advancement

You are now a Grand Postman! (travel discounts)

Mission 7 - Measurements
9. Report back to Kevin
 * 1) Kevin will tell you that Hugo needs the measurements of all of the Post Officers (in any order).
 * 2) to Edron to Chrystal (above depot, here) and ask her 'measurements'
 * 3) to Carlin to Liane (in depot, here) who will request 12 Arrows
 * 4) to Kazordoon to Lokur (North end of the depot) who refers you to his armorer Kroox
 * 5) to Thais to Benjamin (in depot, here)
 * 6) to Venore to Dove (downstairs in depot, here) who asks for Grapes to trim her figure
 * 7) to Ab'Dendriel to Olrik (southwest of depot here) who gambles with you to give his measurements (5gp per roll, bring some gold)
 * 8) The cheapest way is:
 * Walk to Thais and get the measurements from Benjamin
 * Take the ship to Carlin (100 gps), buy 12 arrows with Perac, buy Grapes from Imalas, and get the measurements from Liane
 * Take the ship to Ab'Dendriel (70 gps) and get the measurements from Olrik (Good luck with the dice)
 * Take the ship to Edron (60 gps) and get the measurements from Chrystal
 * Take the ship to Venore (30 gps) and get the measurements from Dove (Remember the grapes? Here you will give them)
 * Walk to Kazordoon and talk to Lokur, who will send you to Kroox. Get the measurements from Kroox

Mission 8 - Missing Courier

 * Kevin tells you that the mail courier Waldo is missing, and that you need to find him, or at least his posthorn.
 * "Where's Waldo?" you ask ... He is in the Thais troll caves (here). You will need a shovel to open the hole.
 * Once in the caves, go East and down the hole:
 * Then go North and East past the Orcs, and up the ladder
 * Waldo will be behind a door directly West:
 * When you find his dead body, "use" it to get Waldos Post Horn.


 * Take the Postal Horn back to Kevin and ask about advancement

You are now a Grand Postman for Special Operations! (Post Horn)

Mission 9 - Dear Santa

 * 1) This time Kevin asks you to deliver some letters to Santa Claus on Vega
 * 2) Open the left blinking door and get a bag (it weighs 500oz!! and no one else can carry it for you, since it won't come out of the chest unless you have the capacity)
 * 3) Take this bag of letters by boat to Vega and go west to Santa's house (here).
 * 4) "Use" the bag on the mailbox (you cannot send "normal" mail through this Mailbox)
 * 5) You will keep the nice red bag, but after you deliver the letters, it will be a normal red bag.
 * 6) Return to Kevin for the last mission!

Mission 10 - Mintwallin

 * 1) Now Kevin gives you a letter to deliver to Markwin in Mintwallin (it's a letter from his mother). Do not attempt this mission unless you can get to Mintwallin, through Mintwallin, and can handle 2 Minotaur Archers, 2 Minotaur Guards, and 2 Minotaur Mages at once!
 * 2) When you are ready, go to Thais Ancient Temple and seek the route to the Minotaur city of Mintwallin.
 * 3) As soon as you say "hi" to Markwin, he will call for his bodyguards. You can also say 'hi' to him from the left side of the castle. This way you can lure a few at a time. Once you prove yourself handling them, you can give him his letter.
 * 4) Return to Kevin and ask about advancement.

You are now an Arch Postman! (can use locked mailboxes)

For a list of locked mailboxes, read the page about Mailboxes

Mission 1 - Check Postal Routes
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: You are not a member of our guild yet! We have high standards for our members. To rise in our guild is a difficult but rewarding task. Are you interested in joining?

player: yes Kevin: Hm, I might consider your proposal, but first you will have to prove your worth by doing some tasks for us. Are you willing to do that?

player: yes Kevin: Excellent! Your first task will be quite simple. But you should better write my instructions down anyways. You can read and write?

player: yes Kevin: So listen, you will check certain tours our members have to take to see if there is some trouble. First travel with Captain Bluebear's ship from Thais to Carlin, understood?

player: yes Kevin: Excellent! Once you have done that you will travel with Uzon to Edron. You will find him in the Femor Hills. Understood?

player: yes Kevin: Fine, fine! Next, travel with Captain Seahorse to the city of Venore. Understood?

player: yes Kevin: Good! Finally, find the technomancer Brodrosch and travel with him to the Isle of Cormaya. After this passage report back to me here. Understood?

player: yes Kevin: Ok, remember: the Tibian mail service puts trust in you! Don't fail and report back soon. Just tell me about your MISSION.

player: bye

Mission 2 - Fix Mailbox
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: So you have finally made it! I did not think that you would have it in you ... However: are you ready for another assignment?

player: yes Kevin: I am glad to hear that. One of our mailboxes was reported to be jammed. It is located on the so called 'mountain' on theisle Folda. Get a crowbar and fix the mailbox. Report about your mission when you have done so.

player: bye

Mission 3 - Bill Delivery
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: Excellent, you got it fixed! This will teach this mailbox a lesson indeed! Are you interested in another assignment?

player: yes Kevin: For your noble deeds I grant you the title Assistant Postofficer. All Postofficers will charge you less money from now on. After every second mission ask me for an ADVANCEMENT. Your next task will be a bit more challenging. Do you feel ready for it?

player: yes

Kevin: I need you to deliver a bill to the stage magician David Brassacres. He's hiding from his creditors somewhere in Venore. It's likely you will have to trick him somehow to reveal his identity. Report back when you delivered this bill.

player: bye

Visit to A Strange Fellow
player: hi A Strange Fellow: Uh? What do you want?!

player: hat A Strange Fellow: What? My hat?? Theres... nothing special about it!

player: hat A Strange Fellow: Stop bugging me about that hat, do you listen?

player: hat A Strange Fellow: Hey! Don't touch that hat! Leave it alone!!! Don't do this!!!!

player: hat A Strange Fellow: Noooooo! Argh, ok, ok, I guess I can't deny it anymore, I am David Brassacres, the magnificent, so what doyou want?

player: bill A Strange Fellow: A bill? Oh boy so you are delivering another bill to poor me?

player: yes A Strange Fellow: Ok, ok, I'll take it. I guess I have no other choice anyways. And now leave me alone in my misery please. A Strange Fellow: Still I am better in vanishing!

Mission 4 - Aggressive Dogs
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: You truly got him? Quite impressive. You are a very promising candidate! I think I have another mission for you. Are you interested?

player: yes Kevin: Ok, listen: we have some serious trouble with agressive dogs lately. We have accumulated some bones as a sort ofpacifier but we need more. Collect 20 bones like the one in my room to the left and report here.

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: Do you bring ONE bone for our officers' safety fund or ALL bones at once?

(if one by one)

player: one Kevin: Excellent! You have collected n bones. Just report about your mission again if you find more.

Mission 5 - Present Delivery
player: mission Kevin: You have made it! We have enough bones for the fund! You remind me of myself when I was young! Interested in another mission?

player: yes Kevin: Since I am convinced I can trust you, this time you must deliver a valuable present to Dermot on Fibula. Do NOT open it!!! You will find the present behind the door here on the lower right side of this room.

...

player: hi Dermot: Dermot: Hello, traveller player. How can I help you?

player: present Dermot: You have a present for me?? Realy?

player: yes Dermot: Thank you very much!

Mission 6 - New Uniforms
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: Splendid, I knew we could trust you. I would like to ask for your help in another matter. Are you interested?

player: yes Kevin: Ok. We need a new set of uniforms, and only the best will do for us. Please travel to Venore and negotiate with Hugo Chief acontract for new uniforms.

...

Hugo
player: hi Hugo: Be greeted, player!

player: new set of uniforms Hugo: A new uniform for the post officers? I am sorry but my dog ate the last dress pattern we used. You need to supply us with a new dress pattern.

player: new dress pattern Hugo: It was ... wonderous beyond wildest imaginations! I have no clue where Kevin Postner got it from. Better ask him.

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: new dress pattern Kevin: Oh yes, where did we get that from ...? Let's see, first ask the great technomancer in Kazordoon for the technical details. Return here afterwards.

Talphion
player: hi Talphion: HIHOOOO player!

player: new dress patterns Talphion: DRESS FLATTEN? WHO WANTS ME TO FLATTEN A DRESS?

player: new dress patterns Talphion: A PRESS LANTERN? NEVER HEARD ABOUT IT!

player: new dress patterns Talphion: CHESS? I DONT PLAY CHESS!

player: new dress patterns Talphion: A PATTERN IN THIS MESS?? HEY DON'T INSULT MY MACHINEHALL!

player: new dress patterns Talphion: AH YES! I WORKED ON THE DRESS PATTERN FOR THOSE UNIFORMS. STAINLESS TROUSERES, STEAM DRIVEN BOOTS! ANOTHERMARVEL TO BEHOLD! I'LL SENT A COPY TO KEVIN IMEDIATELY!

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: new dress pattern Kevin: The mail with Talphion's instructions just arived. I remember we asked Queen Eloise of Carlin for the perfect colours. Go there, ask her about the UNIFORMS and report back here.

Queen Eloise
player: hail queen eloise Queen Eloise: I greet thee, my loyal subject.

player: uniforms Queen Eloise: I remember about those uniforms, they had a camouflage inlay so they could be worn the inside out too. I will send some color samples via mail to Mr. Postner.

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: new dress pattern Kevin: The queen has sent me the samples we needed. The next part is tricky. We need theuniforms to emanate some odor that dogs hate.The dog with the best 'taste' in that field is Noodles,the dog of King Tibianus. Do you understand so far?

player: yes Kevin: Good. Go there and find out what taste he dislikes most: moldy cheese, a piece of fur or abananaskin. Tell him to SNIFF, then the object. Show him the object and ask 'Do you like that?'.DONT let the guards know what you are doing.

Noodles
player: hi Noodles: Woof!

player: Sniff banana skin Noodles:

player: Do you like that? Noodle: Woof!

player: Sniff Dirty Fur Noodles:

player: Do you like that? Noodles: Woof!

player: Sniff moldy cheese Noodles:

player: Do you like that? Noodles: Meeep! Grrrrr!

... player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: new dress pattern Kevin: Fine, fine. I think that should do it. Tell Hugo that we order those uniforms. The completed dress pattern will soon arrive in Venore. Report to me when you have talked to him.

Hugo again
player: hi Hugo: Be greeted, player!

player: new dress pattern Hugo: By the gods of fashion! Didn't it do that I fed the last dress pattern to my poor dog? Will this mocking of all which is taste and fashion never stop?? Ok, ok, you will get those ugly, stinking uniforms and now get lost, fashion terrorist.

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: Excellent! Another job well done! Would you accept another mission?

player: advancement Kevin: You are worthy indeed. Do you want to advance in our guild?

player: yes Kevin: From now on it shall be known that you are a grand postman. You are now a privilegedmember until the end of days. Most captains around the world have an agreement with our guild to transport our privileged members, like you, for less gold.

Mission 7 - Measurements
player: mission Kevin: Good, so listen. Hugo Chief informed me that he needs the measurements of our postofficers. Go and bring me the measurements of Ben, Lokur, Dove, Liane, Chrystal and Olrik.

...

Benjamin
player: hi Benjamin: Hello. How may I help you player?

player: measurements Benjamin: Oh they dont change that much since in the old days as... 

Liane
player: hi Liane: Hello player. May I help you?

player: measurements Liane: I have more urgent problem to attend then that. Those hawks are hunting my carrier pigeons. Bring me 12 arrows and I'll see if I have the time for this nonsense. Do you have 12 arrows with you?

player: yes Liane: Great! Now I'll teach them a lesson ... For those measurements ... 

Olrik
player: hi Olrik: Greetings, Nocona. May I help you?

player: measurements Olrik: My measurements? Listen, lets make that a bit more exciting ... No, no, not what you think! I mean let's gamble. I will roll a dice. If I roll a 6 you win and I'll tell you what you need to know, else I win and get 5 gold. Deal?

player: yes Olrik: Ok, and its ... number! You have lost. He he. Another game?

player: yes Olrik: Ok, no weights in the dice, no dirty tricks, are you ready?

(This may take a few tries)

player: yes Olrik: Ok, here we go ... 6! You have won! How lucky you are! So listen ...

Lokur
player: hi Lokur: Hiho player. May I help you?

player: measurements Lokur: Come on, I have no clue what they are. Better ask my armorer Kroox for such nonsense.Go and ask him for good ol' Lokurs measurements, he'll know.

player: hi Kroox: Welcome to Kroox Quality Armor, player!

player: Lokurs measurements Kroox: Hm, well I guess its ok to tell you ... 

Dove
player: hi Dove: Be greeted, noble player.

player: measurements Dove: Oh no! I knew that day would come! I am slightly above the allowed weight and if you can't supply me with some grapes to slim down I will get fired. Do you happen to have some grapes with you?

player: yes Dove: Oh thank you! Thank you so much! So listen ...

Chrystal
player: hi Chrystal: At your service player.

player: measurements Chrystal: If its necessary ... 

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

Mission 8 - Missing Courier
player: mission Kevin: Once more you have impressed me! Are you willing to do another job?

player: yes Kevin: Ok but your next assignment might be dangerous. Our Courier Waldo has been missing for a while. I must assume he is dead. Can you follow me so far?

player: yes Kevin: Find out about his whereabouts and retrieve him or at least his posthorn. He was looking for a new underground passage that is rumoured to be found underneath the troll-infested Mountain east of Thais.

...

player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: So Waldo is dead? This is grave news indeed. Did you recover his posthorn?

player: yes Kevin: Thank you. We will honour this. Your next mission will be a very special one. Good thing you are a special person as well. Are you ready?

player: yes Kevin: Your eagerness is a virtue, young one, but first lets talk about advancement.

player: advancement Kevin: You are worthy indeed. Do you want to advance in our guild?

player: yes Kevin: From now on you are a grand postman for special operations. You are an honoured member of our guild and earned the privilege of your own post horn. Here, take it.

Mission 9 - Dear Santa
player: mission Kevin: So are you ready for another Mission?

player: yes

Kevin: So listen well. Behind the lower left door you will find a bag. The letters in the bag are for none other than Santa Claus! Deliver them to his house on the isle of Vega, USE thebag on his mailbox and report back here.

...

Mission 10 - Mintwallin
player: hi Kevin: Greetings player, what brings you here?

player: mission Kevin: You did it? I hope you did not catch a flu in the cold! However theres another mission for you. Are you interested?

player: yes Kevin: Excellent. Here is a letter for you to deliver. Well, to be honest, no one else volunteered. It's a letter from the mother of Markwin, the king of Mintwallin. Deliver thatletter to him, but note that you will not be welcome there.